changing my website name
Friday, September 23, 2011 
Fall in Vermont. This is my favorite season. Taken on on October 6, 2007.
I am pulling the final trigger on gipsylife.com. This has been in the making for a while now, ever since my first run-in with the Romani woman who took offense at my use of the word gipsy. I understood her point of view but continued using the name because it was meaningful to me in a way that was very different to its literal definition. Then, last month, I read Karen’s post on her reaction to the word badass and that got me thinking again. I have a strong dislike of derogative words that are taken out of context and used to emphasize a point, or apply a level of superlative that we seemingly cannot express otherwise. I get why people do this. And the more they do it the more it becomes accepted practice. But it makes me shudder inside to hear people talk like this and I swear, if I hear one more time how I should create a kickass *f*ing awesome life for myself, I will scream! Grrr. I blame my grandparents who were very old-school intellectuals and insisted on the ‘proper’ use of language, on being polite, on respecting words and, thus, other people. Respect was important to them, and it still is to me. So what’s my point? Well, I am doing it, too. I am taking a derogative word out of context, and while the term gypsy has evolved into something more light-hearted in our Western culture, it still carries a stigma of being insulting and demeaning to many people amongst the Romani ethnicity. Even though I do not agree with being harrassed in the manner I have been, or with having my name slandered across various websites - something that unsettles me deeply - I am no longer comfortable with using a name for my online persona that causes such strong and violent reactions. Ultimately I like harmony in my life and do not enjoy going around offending people, no matter how harmless I think my intentions are. We all have to make decisions about how far we are prepared to go for a ‘cause’ and I have never had an agenda of turning this into a cause in the first place. And so I have decided to let it go.
But this is not the only reason.
My reference to the word gypsy was never about the bohemian lifestyle that it is commonly associated with, it’s just something I’ve been called for most of my life on the grounds of all my traveling and moving around. “Ah, you’re such a gypsy, Kerstin.” And for the longest time I have completely identified with that restless wanderer. But I have reached a point in my life where I want to put down some roots for real, and not just talk about it (because I have been doing that for a while) but start doing it. Other people in their mid-life, mostly those who are on the verge of becoming empty-nesters, want to get out and travel and experience the world. Not me. Oh, I still love to travel, but I no longer have this deep-seated urge to explore the far-flung corners of this world. I have done that. These days I happily return to places I already know, travel is more about nurturing friendships and seeing my family, rather than conquering new places. My favorite blogs are those of the home-makers while travel-related ones leave me cold. I long for home. For real life connections. Friends. Family. For a place where we can have lots of conversations over soup. When I remembered that post, and the photo book that I also named after it, I knew that I wanted this to be the new name for my blog. It’s all about inviting in that which we yearn for, about manifesting our dreams in whatever way we can. Choosing a name that connects me to a relevant and meaningful experience seems a good starting point.
Other than that I have also been enjoying a little redesign of this space (I am so in love with Squarespace and their clever interface) and given it a clean and seasonal look ~ I love autumn! To subscribe to the new blog address please click on the relevant link below, thank you! And I promise, no more URL changes :)
Reader Comments (9)
hello friend! : )
xo
So lovely to catch up with what you are doing and where you are. Conversations over soup is perfect... cozy, healthful, reminds me of friends falling into deep conversation no longer how long they have been parted.
All my best to you!
I think this new blog title fits really well with all that I've read from you - so all the best for your new blog HOME and may you find the peace you are looking for in your real life home too! :)
Much love,
Sylke
"Ultimately I like harmony in my life and do not enjoy going around offending people, no matter how harmless I think my intentions are."
"It’s all about inviting in that which we yearn for, about manifesting our dreams in whatever way we can."
And of course, I would link back to you. Looking forward to many conversations over soup.
Whatever you call the blog, I know I'll always enjoy reading your stuff and having conversations with you along the way.
Hugs, Deb